The Pledge

In a year when pledges have become all the rage for Republican presidential primary candidates, The Family Leader’s Marriage Vow seems to be falling flat.

It seems only two of the 641 Republican candidates for president have signed it, which means one of two things. Either the unsigned candidates are willing to go to the mat with evangelicals to defend their right to commit adultery, or they realize that the vow does not address the single most important threat to marriage as we know it, creamed corn.

Just kidding. While there's some debate about the effect of creamed corn on marriage, that's another post. Seriously, the pledge says absolutely nothing, zip, zero, nada, about how bad children are for marriages. That's right, children. For thousands of years we've been told without children the species will die out, disappear, become extinct. But has anyone ever tried it?

Now don't get me wrong, I have a daughter, and having her has  been far better than a 13 year long case of halitosis. But she's really time consuming, way more expensive than $4 gasoline, and now when she orders french fries she eats the whole bag. 10 years ago there were always fries left over that I got to eat.
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And that's the dirty little secret why the candidates won't sign the pledge. Everyone knows how bad kids are for the world, they're just afraid to admit it. Trust me.